i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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