yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
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