we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
He shit in the fireplace
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
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