so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
Randomize
