so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
