I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
