I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
Randomize
