Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
