Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
Enjoy the penises
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
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