he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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