david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Randomize
