Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
