I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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