I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
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