I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
