ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Randomize
