she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
