guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
