I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
