i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Do vagina's smell?
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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