i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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