if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
