my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
Randomize