He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
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