Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
