Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
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