just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
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