You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
Im part way to drunk.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Randomize
