I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
