i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
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