I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
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