Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
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