watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
