Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize
