Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
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