Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize