she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
