the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize
