butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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