so explain again why im purple
no
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize