just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize
