Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Randomize