...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
Randomize
