Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Moan for me like Helen Keller
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
