I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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