so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
