I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
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