I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
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