Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
thus making me awesome and them whores
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
I'm like, not good at living.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize
