and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Randomize
