you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Randomize