So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize
